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RoboCop 3 (1993)
IMDB rating: 3.10
Plot: Omni Consumer Products (OCP) begins its plan for the creation of Delta City. As part of this program, a special Rehab squad leaded by Commander Paul McDaggett is deployed as they evacuate the city in a forced manner tearing down part of the city. In this chaos, a young girl named Nikko is left alone and picked up by a group of citizens joining together to strike on OCP, first raiding a Police Department Armory Warehouse. Murphy is sent to the chase of this group, but he eventually ignored the order when he received a back up call from Anne Lewis and the other officers who were attacked by a group of Cyber Punks. This violation leads to the decision of finally cutting Murphy?s past memories for good, as he finds himself between the line of Law Enforcement and Popular Opinion when the law is beginning to be corrupted, and he is betrayed by the law he sought to uphold when Lewis is killed, and he is left for dead… all of this thanks to Directive 4: “Any attempt to arrest an officer of OCP results in Shut Down.” At the same time, the new younger CEO of OCP begins relations with a Japanese Cybernetics Corporation leaded by a man named Kanemitsu for Monetary support, leading into the deployment of the advanced Android Otomo, a fully skilled Ninja with full human appearance, but still a machine. Slowly as all of Detroit joins the Motor City?s cause, including the Police Department, McDaggett sees use for the arrested criminals to create his own army of criminals to strike down the City?s militia once and for all. The only hope, Murphy overcoming the control placed on him by Directive 4, and bring down this corrupted plan.
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RoboCop 3
Directors: Dekker Fred
Actors: Burke Robert John,Machado Mario,Posey John,Torn Rip,Mako,Castle John,Nemeth S.D.,Taylor Curtis,Vaughn Judson,Strong Ken,Anderson Stanley,Action,Crime,Sci-Fi,
Topless Robot - The 11 Least Excusable Three-quels
Film franchises survive on pure patience. Sequels come with success, but when a profitable movie turns itself into a trilogy, it’d better have a good reason for testing our entertainment endurance. Of course, we have unfathomably high tolerance for buying the same thing over and over, so movies with “Three” in their titles are often staggeringly abundant, especially when they’re digging up a popular original movie years after its exploit-by date. Now we’re plowing through that abundance of “threequels” (how we hate that word) and skimming the sour cream from the…uh, the chaff of something. We’re less concerned with follow-ups to movies that were never big in the first place (sorry, Nemesis) and more with movies based on some success, be it mainstream or cult-level. While we’re sure that many of them seemed like promising ideas at some point, time isn’t always kind to movies about leprechauns and cartoon dinosaurs. Some of these films killed their brand names and others were just the start of long and hideous franchises, but there’s little excuse for any of them. Critters 3 would be just another mediocre hodgepodge of horror, comedy, and lousy special effects if it weren’t also the feature film debut of Leonardo DiCaprio. Well before The Departed or Gangs of New York or his recurring role on Growing Pains , DiCaprio played a preteen repelling an invasion of alien creatures that are more or less Gremlins mixed with Fizzgig from The Dark Crystal . However, the producers of the film had no hint of Leonardo’s future stardom, so the film and its trailer feature only some middling attempts at humor. Unlike the first two movies, there are no space-faring bounty hunters to be seen, and surprisingly few people fall victim to the Critters. New Line Cinema cared so little about Critters 3 that it was shot at the same time as the fourth Critters , just so people could forget 3 faster. The third Leprechaun film is often overlooked, sitting between the first sequel, which shockingly made it into theaters, and the Oscar-winning Leprechaun 4 , which shows a demonic Warwick Davis bursting out of a space marine’s penis. Compared to that, Leprechaun 3 is a routine comedy-horror fumble. It consists of blandly rotten characters stealing the leprechaun’s gold, making wishes, and receiving punishments at the hands of a hellish, rhyming Willow. Case in point: a woman wishes for youth and beauty, so Warwick Davis magically enlarges her lips, breasts, and rear end until she explodes. Then he remarks “What a lovely lass. I had to blow up yer ass!” We’d link to that clip here, but we don’t want to encourage the people who’d find it arousing. It’s supposedly about a young woman’s mental powers driving her to murder, but most of the film looks like unused cuts from a music video or a special version of Baywatch filmed in Thailand. Rest assured, however, that there are exploding heads in there somewhere. Oh, and kickboxing, which says “secret war between insane psychics” like nothing else. We’re putting Alien 3 here more out of sympathy than anything. It’s not a terrible movie in its director’s cut, and it would’ve been nearly impossible to follow Alien and Aliens without recycling one or the other. But when you consider the money, the talent, and the creative potential behind the concept, there’s no reason Alien 3 should’ve turned out the way it did. The first weak link in Alien ’s chain, Alien 3 fell victim to all sorts of studio squabbling: numerous scripts were rejected, including a Hicks-centric treatment by William Gibson, a bleak version by Chronicles of Riddick director David Twohy, and a downright bizarre screenplay that had heroine Ellen Ripley and a xenomorph fighting it out on a wooden planet full of misogynistic monks. The Alien 3 that eventually emerged isn’t bad so much as it’s just dreary and muddled. Taking one of the lamer ideas from the dead-screenplay pile, the film has Ripley dumped on a planet full of men, but they’re mostly boring prisoners and guards, hard to tell apart with all of their heads shaved. First-time director David Fincher, who’d go on to Se7en and Fight Club , didn’t helm the film so much as he stacked up the demands of various producers, and the results are underwhelming. Two of Aliens ‘ more likeable characters die at the start of the movie, and the rest of it runs on the same concpt as the original Alien , only with duller sets and a drab cast. Caught in between the bleak art-house film and the studio crowd-pleaser, Alien 3 ’s true crime is sucking the life out of a promising franchise. A brief history of the first three Iron Eagles : the original movie is a blitheringly un-ironic ’80s fantasy about an air-force brat who steals a jet fighter to rescue his dad from a middle-eastern dictatorship too vague and evil to properly name. He’s helped along by retired Col. Charles “Chappy” Sinclair, played by Louis Gossett, Jr. The sequel ditches the original Iron Eagle ’s hero early on, instead focusing on Chappy’s attempts to lead a joint American-Russian strike force and prove that ex-Commies aren’t so bad. Unsurprisingly, 1992’s Aces: Iron Eagle III brings back Chappy so he and other retired pilots can dismantle a drug cartel. They do this by shooting down planes with grenade launchers and making stereotypical sidekicks say “DAYUM!” Predictable and inane, Iron Eagle III is of interest only to a certain species of online weirdo. While the cast includes Sonny Chiba and the versatile Paul Freeman, the trailer makes a point of introducing bodybuilder Rachel McLish as a Rambo-like resistance fighter. That trailer’s Total Recall music can’t be coincidence, as some producers evidently thought McLish could spend the 1990s doing what Schwarzenegger did in the 1980s (i.e. punching camels and avoiding emotion-related parts). They thought wrong. McLish’s only subsequent role came as a character named, seriously, Rhyia Shadowfeather in some direct-to-video castaway. Yet McLish provides Iron Eagle III’ s only non-trailer YouTube remnant, in which she flexes her way out of prison while site user post comments like “u know any one would be turned on if they saw rachel mclish a former mss olympia being chained and tickled.” It’s sad when a movie is remembered only by people who beat off to it, but it’s no loss when that movie is Iron Eagle III. The chained-and-tickled-female-bodybuilder fetishists can have it.
Jaws 3d is one of the most unintentionally hilarious movies I’ve ever seen. Seeing Dennis quaid seemingly drunkenly careen through sea world raving “there’s a shark! A shark!” is one of the funniest movie moments I can remember seeing as a drunk college student. And while I actually enjoyed pirates 3 and terminator 3, I think spiderman 3 definitely deserves a spot. Spidey 1 and 2 are two of the best superhero films in recent memory, and spidey 3 gives us BS like emo Peter, way too many half assed villains, and an inexcusable retcon of oneof the most important and emotional defining spider man moments.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 09:55:19 AM
TMNT 3 is painful. I’m a fan of the previous Turtles movies, which I think capture the feel of the original animated series and the puppetry, while not innovative, isn’t all that bad. But the third, the Splinter puppet is horrible, and the jokes are awful. And I love that they bring back Elias Koteas as Casey Jones, and it’s obvious that all of his scenes were shot separately, since he’s never in the frame with the turtles, and is primarily shown standing in one spot, or crouching next to the sub-Chuckie Cheese animatronic Splinter.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 09:56:43 AM
i would have put aliens three in the top five for tmnt three true was unnessary and killed the franchise but it was not so evil it deserved number one. that should have been the land before time film. this list proves that sometimes three is not the right number and holly wood will run a franchise into the ground if its a good one
Posted 09/28/2009 at 10:12:37 AM Batman Forever
… sweet Christ, you could sink a battleship with the holes in this list.
And for the record: No, TMNT III is not a bad movie.
Special effects wise? Yes, bad. Clearly the Spliner puppet is among the most hideous things ever made. Was it a family film? Yes.
Nothing, save perhaps slowly having your genitals detached from your body while watching your mother get cornholed by terrorists, is worse that TMNT II: Secret of the Ooze. This is coming from someone who used to watch it twice a day when he first got the video. I got the DVD recently (because being a damn lunatic fanboy, I have to own all of the TMNT movies regardless of quality), and watched it. It made me hurt. As soon as it finished, I contacted my mom, and apologized for putting her through that (not a joke).
The first film was a fantastic experiment in making a movie work for vastly different groups (comic fans, kids who watch the toon, and parents who don’t want to cry themselves to sleep in the theater, but don’t want their kids to see anything that’ll traumatize them). The second film aimed itself squarely at the five year old retards that watched the toon. The third film was simply a family film. It had a decent story, it was inoffensive (minus the turtle boners, I suppose), and unfortunately it was cheaply made. It’s a not-agonizing way to spend an hour and a half on a movie a kid can enjoy, which is completely fucking rare when it comes to kids films (minus Pixar, of course).
Posted 09/28/2009 at 10:28:33 AM
K I start to realize who I’m dealing with when people start suggesting movies for the list that haven’t been made yet…
Matrix 3? X men 3? Not that bad at all, and people actually defending tmnt 3?? This is a movie where the climax hinges on people in the past grasping a mystical object AT THE SAME TIME as people in the present. …wrap your head round that. Truly a shark jumping moment in the live action turtles franchise, which is saying something when the movie already introduced time travel which was a suspension of belief pretty far beyond the “mutated animals” concept of the first two films.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 11:03:10 AM
I agree with Coconut Monkey: No X-Men III? That was a terrible movie where people died for no reason and that had a plot worthy of Michael Bay.
Honestly, Karate Kid III may be my favorite of the series; certainly comparable to II. I like it when Miyagi gets down on the mat with a terrified Daniel Laruso and screams, “Daniel-san! Daniel-san! All right to lose to opponent; must not lose to fear!” Classic.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 11:34:43 AM
I gotta say, as much as I loathe The Lost World, from a purely objective standpoint, I think 1941 and War of the Worlds were much worse Spielberg movies. (I kinda think Crystal Skull might be a little better than Lost World, or maybe on par with it.)
Incidentally, I was the biggest TMNT fan ever, and I didn’t even bother seeing III. Still haven’t.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 12:09:21 PM
Seriously, “Robocop 3″ was about 3x (heh) worse than “Alien 3.” Yes, “Alien 3″ was a disappointment compared to the other films in the franchise. Killing Hicks and Newt was unforgivable. But it wasn’t a bad movie at all. In fact, it’s one of the better sci-fi movies out there and probably the most emotionally authentic of all the Aliens films.
>
Oh thank God, I thought it was just MY dentist’s office…
Posted 09/28/2009 at 12:22:42 PM
“I would argue that Robocop 3 shouldn’t be on this list because Robocop 1 and 2 were so retarded “
Someone didn’t get that Robocop 1 was a satire.
Say what you want about Rachel McLish, at least she looks like she could kick a little ass, unlike the anorexic heroines of, say, everything ever produced by Joss Whedon. The closest Summer Gleau has ever gotten to a gym was if she had to purge in the bathroom on the way home.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 01:34:56 PM
Everyone should already know that the only Triology is Star Wars 4,5,6 and the only sequels that ever improve upon the original are porn sequels. There I said it. 
And by the way, compared to the rest of the series, Alien 3 does not deserve the persecution here.
This was a fun article, but a bit inconsistent. I mean, we all watched Alien/2/3 but who the hell actually bothered with Critters 2/3? Were you all that bored when you were kids? Didn’t you know there were things like Hockey and Baseball? The outdoors? Your father’s nudie mags? Nintendo/Sega? Women (assuming most of the readership here is hetero-male based on the movies)? Listening to your mother nag should have been a better alternative than watching some of these things and most of us should have known better.
I could ask a similar question of you folks for current movies. Why would you subject yourself to anything that has the words “Michael Bay” stamped on it unless that name is immediately followed by the phrase “…gets squashed flat with a semi-truck by one of his pissed-off stunt men”? My girlfriend unknowingly rented Pearl Harbor and we couldn’t bring ourselves to even insert the second disc. We know now, we won’t repeat this mistake again. You don’t go back to that Thai place that gave you food poisoning…do you?
Posted 09/28/2009 at 01:40:19 PM
Alien 3 is the best of the Alien movies.
Ridley Scott’s Alien movie overdoes the atmosphere to the detriment of the pacing and by the time I watched it, the effects were already looking VERY dated. The random “actually he’s a robot” scene was just daft and didn’t really work.
James Cameron’s movie was great, but it wasn’t a horror movie. The scariest part of it was Ripley’s nightmare near the beginning of the movie. Essentially it was an action movie. It’s hilarious to think that after Cameron’s action-packed blockbuster viewers of Alien 3 found it slow and depressing. It was far faster paced than Ridley Scott’s bore-fest.
As has already been mentioned, the complaint against Alien 3 for killing off Newt and Hicks is just comical. What did you want? Ripley, Hicks and Newt teaming up as the “Super Alien Hunters”? If a little brat can beat the aliens there is little reason to fear them and Ripley cannot take centre stage while she’s standing behind a fully trained marine.
Who doesn’t think of Ellen Ripley with her shaved head? Alien 3 is the most iconic aliens movie and it’s also the first to give us a real connection between the fate of Ripley and the aliens. Get down on your knees and plead for forgiveness right f**king now. Ok?
Posted 09/28/2009 at 02:07:47 PM
I will not say more than what the nerds have already said. Robocop 3 is pure shit. Alien 3 isn’t that bad compared to the films that followed it. TMNT 3 is a kids movie so I give it slack (it’s extremely boring and puts me to sleep, but it’s still a kids flick), Matrix 2 & 3 killed the franchise, The Mummy series is pure ass and will always be ass, Godfather 3 is still good (not really a nerdy movie), Spider-man 3 is super shitty (can’t force myself to watch it again, I tried to, but was bored to tears), Shrek 3 (a kids movie that sucks, part 2 was pretty ass too, but it had it moments), Return of the Jedi (are you kidding me? Compared to the prequels that movie is fucking “The Lion in Winter”), Army of Darkness (lol. You’re kidding right? This movie is great even if it doesn’t really follow the Evil Dead formula, it still rocks), X-3 (not that bad, not that good), Dragon Ball GT, etc……
This list could go on and on, but let’s face it the current list as it stands is not too far off in pinning down some of the most ass tri-quels to make it to film.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 02:42:17 PM
This list is missing so many movies that it’s absolutely criminal. I’m especially amazed by the lack of current crap. Does it take time to get enough perspective to realize how bad some movies can be?
I’m not saying TMNT 3 was a great movie but it doesn’t deserve to be anywhere near the top spot. That movie has been getting underrated for years. It was nice how they decided to explore more of the turtles’ roots instead of just throwing mutagen on more random animals. The movie is still incredibly watchable and it’s definitely better than 2.
The only bad thing is how little Casey Jones was allowed to do.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 02:46:45 PM
I was 8 years old when TMNT III came out.
I remember watching the commercial everyday, and flipping through the toy catalog, gazing wistfully at the movie figures.
My mom promised me, again and again, that we’d go see it. But…it came into theaters. And left. She NEVER got around to taking me. To this day, I still haven’t watched that movie.
And I’ll be honest- I resented her for awhile after that. (Especially since it was part of a long string of maternal-disappointment.)
But today- after watching that trailer for the first time in 16 years….today I kinda want to call her, and say “THANK YOU”.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 04:00:29 PM
Damn, Turtles 3 was pretty retarded. But still more watchable than Matrix 3. I got to see that shit for free and I fell asleep 15 minutes in. Ya know what other movie I fell asleep to? 27 Dresses. Thats right, I just compared Matrix 3 to 27 Dresses. And Robocop 3 didnt even make the list?! Come ON.
And someone wrote Army of Darkness should have made this list? What?! You’re either crazy or just a Lame wad.
Posted 09/28/2009 at 07:35:37 PM
Y’know guys (and girls)? We can argue about what movies need to be added or deleted to this list all day.
However, in my opinion (which everyone here must hear for no reason) there has not been a trilogy that was so self-destructive as The Matrix.
I would just about bet my Hot Toys Dark Knight figure that the Wachowski’s didn’t have anything planned past the first film…and when it started selling like hotcakes they fuckin’ panicked and churned out the two sequels we got.
I mean seriously….why would you invent “the Matrix” and then spend so much of the next two films in the “real world”?
The ending of the Matrix was so freakin’ sweet. It offered such promise, such exciting premises to be explored in the sequels.
Then we get Reloaded and Revolutions. WTF?
Oh, and you know what ruined the whole series for me instantly? That Merovingian (SP?) fuck. Hiding orgasm bombs in matrix cake WTF? AARRRGGHHHH!!!!!
How does making a captive battery avatar orgasm by eating a cake have anything to do with anything? Can someone please explain it to me?
Posted 09/28/2009 at 08:01:27 PM
The worst threequel for me is Austin Powers in Goldmember. Probably the first threequel I ever seriously was looking forward to. I think I strongly anticipated that movie for at least a year. I had seen the previous sequel 4 times in theaters. I remember walking out of Goldmember with a grimace on my face.
Not a threequel, but I experienced similar disappointment with Shrek 2, never bothered with Shrek 3.
Posted 09/29/2009 at 12:19:59 AM
I’d say that the most glaring omission on the list is Superman 3. The people that made Halloween 3 apparently learned at least some lesson from it while the Salkinds went ahead and made the equally terrible Quest for Peace. Robocop 3 sucked, but frankly, so did the second one.
At least a couple of films on this list are noticeable improvements over the previous film. TMNT3 didn’t have Vanilla Ice in it and didn’t have the villains fart and belch themselves into submission, which are massive points to its favor.
JP3 was better than TLW:JP if only because the latter had one of the most glaring plot holes I’ve ever seen in any film in the form of the severed arm hanging off the steering wheel on the bridge of the ship. I don’t know if there’s ever been a movie so totally derailed for me as that one was the minute that damn arm popped up in a location where the T-Rex couldn’t possibly have gotten hold of the man it belonged to.
Posted 09/29/2009 at 03:58:01 AM
Just to add my two cents and agree with some previous posts:
American Werewolf in Paris is horrible, while American Werewolf in London was really good.
Also, the third Matrix movie has to be one of the worst three-quels of all time since it managed to make the first movie (which was very good), and the second movie (which was at least interesting) almost un-watchable. The over the top religious ending, the argument over whether computer created beings have feelings in the beginning, the whole CGI mess where there’s dudes in big mechs shooting squid things….
To be honest, now every time I see or read a series that I think is really cool I say to myself “don’t get too excited, remember how The Matrix turned out….” and keep my hopes grounded.
Posted 09/29/2009 at 09:46:05 AM
JP3 infamously had William H. Macy call the film a “90 million ship without a rudder” or something to that effect. The film was infamously rushed and Spielberg largely distanced himself from the project after the embarassment of TLW.
The Spinosaurus was the new big bad is largely thanks to Jack Horner, who was the paleontological consultant on the films (As well as Crichton’s analog for Alan Grant-the novel version of Grant practically IS Horner). In reality, Spinosaurus probably ate only fish. Then again, T-rex could’ve been a scavenger.
I remember watching Scanners 3 on Showcase Television (Canada’s dimestore version of HBO). It was a total B-movie, with a hilarious bit where the antagonist attempts to kill the hero (via mind control) while being interviewed on a late night talk show. Hilarious!
As far as “least excusable”, I’d say that The Godfather 3, made more than ten years after the fact with the director’s daughter, is wholly inconceivable.
Robocop 3, while inferior to the first film, is at least better than 2, and has Basil Poledouris’ epic theme music to boot.
Posted 09/29/2009 at 03:30:57 PM
The Directors cut of Alien 3 was absolutly fantasic. The hatred of Alien 3 really just stems from the horrible post production editing you could ever do to a movie. This movie should be used in film schools on how NOT to edit a movie. It was no wonder why David Fincher didn’t want anything to do with the Quadrilogy DVD extra’s, his vision of this movie was completly and utterly erased when it got to the hands of Terry Wrawlings, who for the most part is a great editor.
Posted 09/29/2009 at 09:42:18 PM
I’ve seen plenty of good arguments for bad part 3s, but someone said there are no good part 3s. Wrong.
Rocky 3 - introduced us to Mr. T/Clubber Lang, Eye of the Tiger, Hulk Hogan/Thunderlips, and more coolness with Apollo Creed
Back to the Future 3 - worth it just for Buford “Mad Dog” Tannen and the almost unexplainable lines: “Mighty strong words, runt. You man enough to back em’ up with more than just a pie plate?”
Nightmare on Elm Street 3 - brought us Patricia Arquette, young Larry Fishburne, and one of Freddy’s best lines “It’s your big break in TV, welcome to prime time, bitch!” And the Dokken “Dream Warriors” awesome song. Ah, glam rock, or whatever.
Child’s Play 3 - nah, more just b/c it’s partially unintentionally funny.
Return of the King is obvious enough
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkabahn still stands right now as my favorite movie of the series (2nd favorite book, behind the last one).
Enough
Oh yeah, I thought Karate Kid 3 was decent as a kid. Now, I think it’s good for it’s cheese.
Posted 09/30/2009 at 04:57:26 AM
I think Spider-Man 3 gets more hate than it deserves. Yes, Peter acts emo. What you’re forgetting is that he acts emo in the whole series. Pick up a comic book, sure he has his tragic moments, but for the most part he’s cracking jokes. I can’t think of a single time in the film trilogy where he seems to be enjoying himself. It’s constant “With great power comes great mopiness!” They just turned it up for the third film because the plot required it. Ignore that, and it’s not terrible.
Posted 09/30/2009 at 10:36:17 AM
Just for the record, Halloween 3 should NOT be included on this list, because Carpenter’s original concept for the Halloween franchise was of an anthology series, maybe something similar to Night Gallery for the movie theater. The fact that the plot totally goes away from the concept of the original film is what killed the box office, but I loved the concept. I mean a new Carpenter horror flick every year? Gotta love the idea. The Halloween films between H3 and H20 were so crappy, and Halloween 3 is actually a creepy flick. I would rather have had the anthology rather than H4-H6,that seriously dragged the fanchise down far worse, IMHO.
Posted 10/02/2009 at 11:52:51 PM
